Expressing your creativity can be one of the most therapeutic things for some people. And turning your creative expression into a job really takes courage, strength, and determination. Tanea Smith happens to be a women with all of these amazing attributes. She used her love for writing and self expression to create her online stationary boutique “She’s Got Papers.”

Honey Magazine: What was the inspiration for the launch of your online stationary boutique “She’s Got Papers”?
My love of paper started when I was a little girl. It was while I was on maternity leave after the birth of my daughter that I began contemplating what I wanted my next steps to be. After 11 years in corporate, I decided that it was time for me to pursue something that I was truly interested in. The idea that I shared with my sister in 2002 of doing something in the stationery business immediately came to mind.

How did you come up with the name?
“She’s Got Papers On Me” was a popular song in the 1980’s by Richard ‘Dimples’ Fields. My mom played the song around the house when I was a little girl. The idea of making it the name of the business came to my sister in a dream. It was perfect!

How do you come up with ideas for each collection?
My first collection, which I call “The Basics” was made up of a children’s, teen, and women’s collection. The baby collection was easy because I was now a mom of a little girl and had all these pretty things around me to draw from. For the teen collection, I spoke to a lot of my son’s female friends to figure out what a teen girl might gravitate to, hence the lip gloss and blue jeans. The women’s collections are all based on my life experiences with weight, self love, pursuing my dreams, taking risks, overcoming prejudice, & my love of writing & self expression.

What do you feel sets your boutique apart from others?
She’s Got Papers is a relatable brand. The pieces in my collection are reflective of the occurrences and events in one’s life. The pieces literally have personalities all their own. I design specifically to make you think and I made the decision at the onset that all of my cards would be blank on the inside. I’ll provide the design and the quote and hopefully that encourages the buyer to let their imaginations flow. It’s the personal touch of a handwritten note.

What was your career turning point?
If you’ve spent several years working at a career that you’re not particularly passionate about there is usually a catalyst for you to make a change. For me, it was definitely the birth of Jada Jasmine. And while I still have my 9 to 5 job, I’m clear on my next destination and that’s what keeps me lifted.

Are there any other projects that you are working on that you would like to share with our readers?
I’m working on a new collection called “The Professionals”. It is by far the most creative collection that I’ve ever done. And I think I’ve grown a lot. The idea to do it came directly from the customers.

What advice do you have for someone that wants to follow a path similar to yours?
Do your research. You’ve got to figure out how you are going to situate yourself in the marketplace. The stationery industry is a billion dollar industry, so there’s certainly room for you. But, what is going to set you apart from your peers? Find your own “lane” and work it.

What is your average day like?
I oversee the urban department here at ASCAP and I will just give you a little background about ASCAP first. We are a performance rights organization. We protect the rights of the songwriters and we make sure they get paid fairly for the performances of their music. Our members include everyone from legends like Quincy Jones and Smokey Robinson to artists like Beyonce, Maxwell, TI, and Jay Z. As VP of membership, I am in charge of maintaining relationships with our current writers while also figuring out ways to cultivate new relationships with up and coming writers. So that’s pretty much what we do in the membership department.

Do you love your job?
I absolutely love it. I don’t practice as much law as I used to but for me this was a great position because it allowed me to be more creative and to interact with creative people.
And when I was practicing law I was pushing papers and I just wanted to do more so this is definitely just allowing me to do that.

We heard that the Rhythm and Soul awards were amazing and that Prince and some other really great artists were there. Did you put that show together?
I put it together with my team…we did everything. It’s a lot of work and takes us months to plan. But it definitely pays off in the end because it is such an amazing night.

Why do you think this award show is so important?
I think that this award show is so important because it recognizes the contributions of the people that create the music and these contributions are so valuable.  And they are so grateful for it and I think it is one of the most important award shows because of that.

What inspired you to become an entertainment lawyer?
Well growing up I was always exposed to music. My mom was a music lover so I was listening to Smokey Robinson, Diana Ross, The Supremes, Four Tops…the whole Motown sound. Music was always playing in my house. My mom is also a songwriter as well so I was just always exposed to music and then I ended up going to law school. Because of my love for law and my love of music, it just all came together. I wanted to pursue a career where I was giving back but where I was also having a good time.

What advice do you have for someone that wants to follow a similar career path?
I guess I would just say to define your goals, stay focused, and then follow them through because it is so easy to get distracted especially as a young person. We also just have to remember that this is a tough job market right now and the competition is vast so when you do make contacts just stay in touch with them because it could be very helpful to you going forward.

Where do you see yourself next year and do you have an ultimate goal as far as your career goes?
It is so interesting because if you had asked me five years ago what I would have been doing, I wouldn’t have said running the urban department at ASCAP so I am pretty much open to just seeing where this whole thing leads me. In terms of the next year, I see myself continuing to help ASCAP and the membership department grow and continuing to service these amazing writers that we have.

What was your first job ever?
My first job ever was a summer day camp counselor. I think I was like fifteen years old.

Honey Magazine: What was your inspiration for starting Indique Hair International?
When I was a hairstylist, my former clients inspired the start of Indique. I initially planned on being a local hair provider and never anticipated having a global company. With the help of my business partners, I was able to fill the void that women experienced when shopping for quality human hair. I noticed the void early on while working with my clients. They were frustrated with hair quality, lack of information on human hair, and poor customer service. Ordering hair was scary because they had to rely on ordering from online websites that lacked something as simple as a customer service contact phone number. Most premium hair websites also lacked in-depth info and detailed images. I decided to take the ordering process into my own hands for all of my clients. I expressed my compassion and concern for them. They began to trust my opinions about the hair and I eventually became their main source for ordering hair. Throughout all of this I learned what the customer wanted with a stylist’s point of view. Now that I’m in the manufacturers position, I’m able to provide to the fullest by placing each Indique customer in my “styling chair”.

What steps did you take to start your company and did you have any formal training in the hair industry before that?
I was a former hair stylist who specialized in hair extensions and non-surgical hair restoration. My experience in working with Indian hair gave me the knowledge and expertise that gave me the edge I needed to run a hair company. I also did hair styling with photographers for editorial shoots and testing. Working on-set gave me the experience and confidence I needed to take Indique’s brand image to the next level. To this day, I still do hair at our photo shoots. I’m very hands-on.

There are so many brands for women to choose from. What sets Indique Hair apart?
Indique is the only Indian hair brand that produces hair at the source. We have our own production factory in India where we can oversee the production from start to finish. This gives us complete control over quality assurance and consistency. Most Indian hair brands get their stock from various vendors which leads to inconsistency in hair and weft quality. We are also the only global company who’s partner happens to be an African-American female, who happens to be me!

What advice do you have for someone that wants to launch their own hair line?
It’s very important to obtain the fine quality hair to succeed in this business. Customer relations is also key. Many woman who wear hair extensions have had bad experiences with hair for many years. Gaining and maintaining their trust is vital to the hair line’s success and longevity.

Why do you feel it is important for women to have hair options such as weaves, wigs etc?
Hair is like clothing. On an average day, you have the option to wear a skirt, pants, flats or stilettos. Why not have the option to wear clip-in extensions, a fall, or an easy ponytail to complete your look? Everything works together from head to toe.

Where do you see yourself next year?
I see myself opening up more Indique Boutiques across the globe; providing custom pieces for women suffering from hair loss due to chemotherapy and alopecia; and supporting more charity organizations.

Life is a beautiful thing! And what makes it even better is that there are people that dedicate their lives to helping ordinary people live extraordinary lives. Considering her work an investment in humanity, Lisa Nicole Bell works hard to spread the message of empowerment through her media company, books, and film.

Honey Magazine: Tell us a little about Inspired Life Media Group and Inspired Girls International. How did they come to life?
Inspired Life Media Group is the housing of a variety of ventures that share the goal of helping ordinary people live extraordinary lives. I realized that I had a lot of talents and great ideas, but at the end of the day, I’m just one person so I needed a team. I saw the incredible potential for me to be a change agent and a catalyst for positive transformation so I decided to use business, entertainment, and new media to share powerful messages that would empower people all over the world. Life With Inspiration empowers adults with inspiration, education, and application of success principles and systems. I think anyone can learn to be successful with the right systems so we show people how to create success in every area of their lives in our Inspired Living Coaching Community. Inspired Girls International is a subsidiary of Inspired Life Media Group, and it’s a personal development company and lifestyle brand for teen girls. The company gives tomorrow’s successful woman her toolkit today by going beyond self-esteem to teach girls the secrets to feminine success in mind, body, and spirit. I had a lot of advantages growing up but still had to learn so many life lessons the hard way so I created a company that would inspire girls to achieve, but most importantly, show them how to be successful at every stage in their lives. Inspired Life Entertainment uses film, television and stage to inspire the masses and create social change. So, even though there are three companies in the conglomerate, they’re very closely related and share the common thread of inspiration and empowerment.

Why did you feel it was important to launch these projects?
At the end of my life, I want to be able to comfortably tell God that I used everything he gave me. About four years ago, I realized that I was living and performing well under my potential, and that needed to change. I decided to learn how to create scalable businesses that could create powerful change in the world and since I’m passionate about media and entertainment, it just made sense to bring it all together. I believe that servant leadership is the rent I’m paying for being on the planet so I consider my work an investment in humanity. I really just want to leave the world better than I found it and inspire other people to do the same.

When does your tour start and where will it be?
The Inspired Girls Success Summit is a one day empowerment event for teen girls and their parents. The tour kicks off in Los Angeles on August 28th and goes on to Houston, New York, Nashville, and Atlanta. We’re stoked about being able to touch the lives of so many girls and parents on this tour. We create awesome partnerships with sponsors, women, and educators to produce something special for the communities we visit.

What was your inspiration for your book “Divine Inspirations”?
I observed a disconnect between the spiritual concepts that seem to inspire us – love, joy, peace, harmony – and the actual day to day results we get in our lives. I wanted to explore how and why some people are able to maintain such positive momentum yet others struggle to get through the day. I did extensive study on the integration of spirituality and personal development and created some powerful steps people can take to stay in an inspired place every day by making some simple, powerful shifts in their mindset and actions.

How did you go about publishing? What steps did you take?
I wanted complete creative control over my book, and I knew little about the publishing industry at the time. I knew that I was an excellent writer and that I had something important to say so I went through a POD house and got it done. Because of that, I really had to learn the ropes of PR, marketing, and sales in an organic way so I have a strong understanding of my platform, its importance, and its relevance. It was a wonderful learning experience, and now I’m in the process of working on my next book which I’ll publish with a traditional publisher, armed with my knowledge of how to maximize my opportunities around my book.

Word on the street is that you are an award winning Filmmaker. Details Please?
Streets never stop talking, huh? (laughter) Yes, I started my career in entertainment as an actress, and from there, I started writing and producing. I am a creator at heart so getting into other aspects of production was a natural progression. As an actress, producer, and writer, my projects have earned awards and nominations for a variety of awards like the NAACP Theatre Award and the Cable Positive Award. Film and TV are powerful platforms of influence so the mission of empowering the masses continues with Inspired Life Entertainment’s TV show and film in development.

Sometimes known as super energetic, super interns, or just really driven, people with that extra flair shine from a mile away. Indigo Charles is one of those bright individuals. This personal assistant to Solange Knowles, fashion student, and budding new musician is definitely someone to look out for.

Honey Magazine: How did you land the amazing opportunity to be Solange Knowles personal assistant?
I’m SO lucky! I adore Solo. It really is all thanks to my mommy. My mother was Vice President of Publicity for Mathew Knowles’ Music World Entertainment for several years and she always let me tag along on shoots and events. No free ride though, she made me WORK. She worked closely with Solange and we built such a great relationship with Solange, that even when my mom wasn’t working for the company any longer, we still maintained a relationship. One night we all went to dinner in Santa Monica and she was like, “Indigo I need a mommy helper/ babysitter,” which is what I started out doing for her. It quickly blossomed into a full blown assistant position where I now travel on the road with her to gigs, handle her schedule…everything.

What is a day in the life like of a celebrity assistant?
Oh boy…depends on what day of the week it is There are days where it’s mellow and I am just running errands for her. There are other days where we are flying from one part of the country to another, checking into our hotel, and then rushing out to a gig. Solange has been busy on the road DJ’ing lately. She’s a HOT DJ. There are also a lot of emails, phone calls, pitches, approvals/declines, and the most amazing and smart 5 year old as a part of my day. It’s busy and I love it. I’ve become quite the multi-tasker. I’m blessed to be a part of such a great group of people.

So we hear that Solange twitpic’d your prom photo last year as an inspiration to young girls that you can be fly and different. How does that make you feel that it got over 122,000 thousand views?
We have this thing we always say to each other, I think my mom started it. Kind of an ice breaker if there are lulls in a conversation, we’ll say, “Fun Fact!” And then you say something totally random. So one night Solange says, “Fun Fact! You, little missy, have the most viewed twitpic on my page, lol.” To be honest with you, I couldn’t even believe it. Me? I was already shocked when she asked my mom if she could twit pic it, because she wanted to show other girls you could be fly and different. It felt really awesomesauce (my favorite word right now), especially when I read the comments below of people saying how inspired they were. If I could inspire someone to explore new avenues and feel comfortable about it, then I am doing something right and that’s really special.

We hear you are in school studying fashion. Do you want to be a fashion designer?
I am a student at FIDM in downtown LA. I am majoring in Visual Communications with hopes of eventually growing into a trend spotter for a major designer. A trend spotter travels all over the world and really entrenches themselves into the underground, young and hot scenes. What’s happening on the street level, in the clubs and with the “ahead of their times” cool fashionistas is what eventually comes back and becomes next season’s new look. So when flowers, leather or animal prints or Harajuku hotties are “IN,” a trend spotter has fed that info to the designers a year or 2 before hand. I love fashion. I live it.

Who are some of your favorite designers?
My absolute favorite designer is Viktor & Rolf, a male duo from Holland. After them it would be Giorgio Armani (Armani Prive), Chanel, Max Azria, and Marc Jacobs. I am all about vintage, feminine, and fly.

What is your favorite style right now?
I am loving the mixing and matching of bold prints and patterns. It makes such a statement. It says, “I’m here and I know your looking at me.”

Honey Magazine: How was “Karen’s Body Beautiful” born and how did you come up with the name?
Always having an entrepreneurial spirit from a young age, owning my own business was second nature to me.  In the summer of 2003 while  I was on summer vacation from teaching high school history, Karen’s Body Beautiful was born.  I spent the summer researching and experimenting with the many butters, essential oils and herbs I use, and I discovered my passion.
In the fall of 2003 when I returned to teaching, I offered my creations to friends, family, and co-workers and the response was overwhelming!  Six months later in February, 2004 I opened my Clinton Hill, Brooklyn body & bath boutique to share my creations with the world. The name was one of the many great decisions my business partner and loving husband came up with!  We incorporated  “Body Beautiful” to create a brand that caters to the entire body in all dimensions. As time progresses you will see that Karen’s Body Beautiful is a complete lifestyle brand.

Is everything handmade and why did you choose all natural ingredients?
Yes, each bottle and jar is filled with our  handmade products that we carefully create to ensure the best product. When customers walk into Karen’s Body Beautiful they see the full kitchen and products that are made from nature’s best.
I was motivated to build an all natural product line because there were very few truly natural hair and body care products. Karen’s Body Beautiful fills a void because we use natural ingredients for a mass market. I wanted to provide a diverse product line and give consumers access to high quality products!

Going after a dream can be challenging at times. What kept you from giving up along the way?
Failure was simply not an option. Throughout my childhood I was told I could be anything that my heart desired and just as important I was given the tools and resources to do anything.  My mentality in life is that a wall is just a wall, it can be broken down or climbed over.  What others see as dead ends, I see as building blocks. Keeping that same determination from the first day that KBB opened until today is the same amount of drive that I will always have about building my empire. I treat every day as if I just started the business and never get comfortable at a certain level. My vision continues to get bigger and bigger.

Why did you decide to go natural?
I went natural because  I discovered it’s who I am.  One day I was about to rush out of the door to receive my routine perm and my husband hit me with a one word question that hit me like a ton of bricks. “Why?” That was my “Aha moment” that made me realize it’s time to stop running from my natural beauty.

Do you have a hair care regimen you can share?
Yes, of course!  With a bustling business and busy three year old, my regimen is pretty simple. I use the Conditioning Shampoo every week. Every other week  I co-wash with the Luscious Locks Hair Mask. I use the Hair Milk as my daily moisturizer. I also maintain the moisture in my hair by using the Hair Butter twice a week.

Imagine getting into work one day and you find a little purple note card on your desk.  As your workday unfolds you find these little clues everywhere and they eventually lead you to a box in your house with two plane tickets for a weekend getaway. Adding a little creative excitement to your relationship will not only be fun but can also serve as a gentle reminder of how much you and your partner love each other. Whether you are just in the beginning stages or have been together 15 years, Shawna Johnson can help you bring that spark back into your relationship with “Romance Inc.”

Honey Magazine: What was your inspiration for starting your personal romance concierge company “Romance Inc”?
I had been sitting on this idea forever! People outsource everything and who couldn’t use some assistance in the romance category? So I thought, why not? I love cultivating relationships and for years, friends would always seek advice on how to make a birthday special or seek creative, fun and/or cheap date ideas, gift inspiration, romantic proposal ideas, etiquette questions, etc.  I love romance/love and it is just important to me to help people feel good.  I want to help people fall in love and stay there.

What do you specialize in?
My specialty is two –fold.  I specialize in helping people realize that they are more romantic than they think (folks just need help bringing that out) and utilizing creativity, attention to detail and event management skills to help create romantic and memorable moments.

Why are romantic gestures important when trying to keep a relationship strong?
Romantic gestures are important because people want to feel special.  When you first start dating someone and you are getting to know that person, the relationship brings you a particular and inexplicable joy. Why does that feeling have to fade away?  Romantic gestures can help keep things fresh, exciting and makes your mate feel loved and appreciated.

Should people come to you when they are also in the beginning stages of dating?
Of course- Romance, Inc.’s services and packages are for everyone. People are always looking for inspiration or assistance in implementing a plan or surprise no matter the stage of the relationship and we customize our service to fit your relationship needs.   So whether it is the first date or the first day of your lives together, Romance Inc will take care of the details while the client creates unforgettable moments.  The beginning stages are so exciting and it is important to build that spark and then maintain it.

Do you find these romantic gestures beneficial in your own marriage?
Absolutely! We have a lot of fun taking care of each other and looking for different ways to express our love and make the other feel special and appreciated.  We use romantic gestures to say “I am not taking your love for granted”.  We are very appreciative of the small things that say “I care”.

How does the process work when a client first calls you and have you found that your clients are mostly men or women?
We begin with a short question and answer period that allows me to assess if a client just needs help with an idea or if they need assistance with implementation as well.  Clients provide details about their mate’s likes and dislikes, special dates (birthday, anniversary, etc) and what they are trying to achieve with Romance Inc.  A lot of people are doing special things just because (which is super sweet and romantic), because they want to apologize, they want to propose or they need project management and event planning skills for special events like birthday parties, bachelorette parties and weddings. From there, I do research and start implementing the plan to create a romantic event.   Keep in mind that all packages and services are custom and personalized to create.  All the client has to do is show up and enjoy! Surprisingly, the majority of our clientele is female! The guys usually seek Romance Inc.’s assistance during the major gift giving holidays but we have quite a few brides which is really special because I love everything about weddings!  The details and romance surrounding a couple’s wedding and the happiness that couple feels is incredible.  I am always humbled by the experience and appreciative of people trusting me with their most precious moments.

Last night at swanky NYC bar & lounge Japonais, dating expert and Essence Magazine relationship editor Demetria Lucas (pictured above right) hosted “Cocktails With Belle”: a ladies-only cocktail party and meet & greet. The acclaimed author of “A Belle in Brooklyn” and originator of the “cutie run” via Let’s Talk About Pep, Demetria Lucas, brought together an array of powerful women of color in different fields to network, and dish on love & relationships. Affectionately nicknamed our “Black Carrie Bradshaw”,

Honey Magazine: What was your motivation for putting on this event?

Demetria Lucas: I thought it would be great to get together a group of upwardly mobile and ambitious women. It’s so important to network, and I always go off to these cocktails parties and people ask about them so I decided to do one for “Belle in BK”. I wanted to hold this event for my readers to get a chance to bond, network and have a good time.

How has life been since your debut on “Let’s Talk About Pep”. Have things changed alot for you?

I mean, I’ve been blogging for a while so I had a following from that. Then, I made my debut on Let’s Talk About Pep and I had my Essence column, so it’s definitely been baby steps for me. It was kind of one thing after the other but it didn’t happen overnight.

Do people recognize you now?

It’s funny because I blog about my life and people read about my stories every day. So when they meet me it’s like they’ve known me forever. People come up to me and tell me their whole life stories like we’re best friends and I’m like “Wait honey, I just met you!”

Has your love life improved because of all the attention you’ve been getting?

Well, my love life was always been in a good place. But I am seeing someone, if that’s what you’re hinting at.

Who is this mystery man? Is he a celeb? Somebody high-profile?

I’ll say this – he is an amazing man.

For more on Demetria Lucas, check out her blog “A Belle in Brooklyn” and follow her @abelleinbk on Twitter

Image courtesy Mackenton Petion

Honey Magazine: You are the author of 6 books. Do they all have similar themes and can you tell me a little about your most recent book?
Ariana Pierce: The most recent one I came out with is called “30 Days To Making It.” Instead of just writing it like a regular book, I put it on audio. I felt like young people would take time to actually listen to it and pay attention because I know our generation is not big on reading right now which isn’t a good thing but I knew if they got the principles in the book that it would cause them to start reading more. They all do have similar themes. They are about success and being a young person and striving for your dreams and about not waiting until you are older to start your career or your business. You can get the book on www.lifecoach2women.com/store

At what age did you realize you wanted to be an entrepreneur and what or who inspired that?
I think probably at the age of 13 or 14. My mother and my grandparents inspired me to want to own my own businesses because it’s a generational thing. My grandparents owned a business now my parents own a business and my great grandparents owned a business so I think it’s just in my blood. For my 17th birthday instead of getting a gift like clothes or shoes, my mom actually surprised me with my own business. She made this whole presentation for me and was like “You know what, you want to be in business so here is your gift and learn how to run it” and I was like “Ok ,Thanks.”

What was that first business?
It was called the Billionheir Girls Club. Right now I have a blog called The Billionheir Club because I switched it and I didn’t want it to be just for girls. We came out with T-shirts, jewelry, books, and other products. It was like a little club that all of these girls could be a part of and we talked about manners, going to college and things like that.

How did you get the opportunity to be the host of the Young Peoples Success Conference?
Well it’s in conjunction with my moms conference. She is a life coach for women so she helps them out with her books and products so she had been putting on these conferences for a while…I think this is the 12th year. I believe about five years ago she asked me if I wanted to do a young peoples conference and I said sure why not because the information she was giving to the adults was great for the young people but I knew it wasn’t really getting to them. It wasn’t sticking and was a little over their heads. So I started the Young Peoples Success Conference and it’s grown as I’ve grown. So when I was around 16 it was mostly young people but now that I am in college, it is a mix between young people and college students. The last conference happened this past May and it was in Lansing Michigan and Tyler James Williams from “Everybody Hates Chris” came and spoke to the kids. Chris Wilson from the Washington Redskins and Tamara Mathis, the daughter of Judge Mathis spoke. And my other friend by the name of H Wood who is a producer in Hollywood spoke.

How many people came?
Over 500 kids definitely came out to the event.

Why do you feel that events like that are so important?
I think they are important because it is a good way to inspire the young people. I am originally from Grand Rapids. In Detroit the mindset is different and a lot of those kids and people from here think that they can’t make it or get to the top whether it is in entertainment or business or whatever career it is. Many of them think they won’t be able to make it in any arena because of where they come from. So I think that having a conference here in Michigan inspires them and lets them know you have people in your own city who are making things possible, making money, and doing big things. So I think that can be really important for small towns.

What advice do you have for someone that wants to follow a  path similar to yours?
I would say start right now. Don’t wait until you get older or say you are gonna put it off until you get older. Right now while everyone else is partying and hanging out, you start thinking about your career and you start doing your business now. I would also tell them to find somebody who is in the business that they want to be in. So if you want to be in fashion maybe you would look up to Karl Lagerfeld. Look at a successful person that is in your category and do what they did because a great way to making it is following those who have already made it so you don’t make the same mistakes they did. I would do a storyboard of your life…I do that a lot. Tear out pictures from magazines and put up your life. If you want to be a singer, pull out pictures of great singers or actors so that you look at it everyday. Things that you look at everyday you tend to be like or go towards.

What would single women do without the “Cutie Run”? It’s the perfect scenario to meet great men, have dinner or cocktails with one of your girls, and possibly even network at the same time. Demetria Lucas, the creator of the “Cutie Run” is the quintessential “Black Carrie Bradshaw.” This celebrity relationships expert, blogger, and soon to be author, took a few minutes from her fabulous busy schedule to chat with us about how she makes it all happen.

Honey Magazine: What was your inspiration for starting your relationship and lifestyle blog “A Belle in Brooklyn” and how did you come up with the name?
I noticed a void in the conversation about Black women in relationships, or better about Black women who weren’t married. It was all this anger, desperation, bitterness and complaint about where men fall short, and men are terrible and why life isn’t working out, etc. I don’t know that story. Never have; hope I never will. I’d wondered, “where are the stories about women like me?” Women who were then in their mid to late 20s and still scared of marriage, women who genuinely like being single, women who “just” like dating and live fun lives pursuing their dreams successfully.

And too, when I started writing, the reigning books were all this urban fiction with stripper pole tales and dope boy boyfriends. That’s never been my life either. I wanted to read “mundane” Black girl stories. Met this guy, went to this club, went on vacation, something crazy happened or I met this guy, I didn’t get locked up, knocked up, or knocked down. Just had an emotional moment and went home, then got up and went to work the next day and dealt with my co-workers and talked to my girls about what happened the night before. That story is the plot about half the top grossing movies and books (SATC, Bridget Jones), but it seemed like only white women got the pass to just live without some sort of excessive drama. I started writing to fill a void. No crazy or angry Black girl stereotypes, no fighting in the street, no desperation to get married, no hating of Black men. Just life as I live it. Ups and downs with more ups than downs. The name of the blog? When thinking of what to call my blog, I wanted something that reflected the essence of me. I’m a “southern” woman, a prissy “Belle” in the best city and borough on earth, Brooklyn. It’s the perfect descriptor for who I am and how I live.

Now let me give you the backstory; I’m from MD. And despite being on the other side of the Mason Dixon, no one from back home calls themselves Southern. You might get Mid-Atlantic on a good day. That said, I came north at 21 and I have my accent from home. It’s a twang.  I got called “country” relentlessly. Requesting to be called “southern” was the compromise my New York City friends made with me (cause Mid-Atlantic is not an option.) With my “southern” upbringing came a few unshakable southern ways that stand out in Brooklyn.  I’m unfailingly polite (even tipsy), slightly old-fashioned, and pretty dainty. Nine times out of ten, you’ll find me in ruffles and heels in everything but a blizzard. It’s quite a contrast to New York’s grit.

What or who inspired you to be a writer?
My mother instilled a love of books in me at a very young age. She likes to tell people that for the first five years of my life, I never fell asleep without being read to. By 5, I knew how to read, so I read to her instead. When I was old enough to write, I started writing stories and read them to her at bedtime.  I read Terry McMillan’s  Waiting to Exhale when I was 13 and it changed my life. I picked up my mother’s copy on the counter one day, and flopped into the living room with it. I didn’t move for another 10 hours. I was totally engrossed. My parents had book shelves all over the house that held the Black classics — Baldwin, Ellison, Wright, Angelou, Walker, Hurtson, Morrison, etc.— and while I appreciated the writing, it wasn’t relatable to me at that age. The language wasn’t in “my voice”, the settings weren’t modern. But here was McMillan talking in the Black woman voice that was raw without being vulgar, and real. It sounded like the women I heard in the beauty shops, or overheard when my mother and her friends talked to each other. Even before I was old enough to date, I knew that the way McMillan spoke of relationships got to the heart of the matter. I knew at 13, I’d throw my pink fascinator into the ring and give dissecting relationships a shot whenever I had enough experience to speak with authority on the subject.

Congratulations on your new book coming out with Simon and Schuster! Can you share any juicy details?
Hmm. The book is on Atria; it drops June 2011. It’s based on my blog of the last 4 years, A Belle in Brooklyn. I even gave the book the same title as the blog. That’s how closely they are related.
“The Belle Book”, as I affectionately call it, is an advice guide based on what I’ve learned interviewing men everyday for the last several years, making a lot of mistakes dating, and too, eventually learning how to be very successful at meeting and holding the interest of great men.  I share a lot of dating experiences that I haven’t written about on the blog and of course, what I’ve learned from them. I also give further insight into many of the relationships that I talk about on Belle. For anyone who’s ever wondered about the holes in the Mr. Ex story (my version of Mr. Big), I actually share the entire reason it’s over-over. There’s a lot of wrapped up stories and what Oprah calls ‘aha! moments’ for the readers who have been with me since the beginning. Think of it as the uncensored version of the blog.

You are the creator of the “Cutie Run.” So how can single women use this to at least start dating again?
The “cutie run” is a great, easy, and highly effective way to meet guys. I figured it out when I was searching for men on the streets of New York to interview them for my day job. It’s so basic, stay on the look out for attractive men whenever you leave the house. No matter where you are— the gas station, the ATM line, the laundry mat— spot a cutie, smile, say hi, then pay him a compliment.  If he’s interested, he’ll take it from there.
There was a time when I was one of those girls who would go out, then get home and be bummed that for whatever reason no guys I was interested in tried to talk to me. Or I’d see a guy and he’d look at me and I’d look back and he’d keep looking, but then he never spoke. The “cutie run” eliminates the idea of going out and never meeting anyone new because it puts the power back in your hands. And that silly back and forth of all looking and not speaking? Doesn’t exist anymore. On the days that I felt like it (and before the SO- significant other, who coincidentally, I met on a cutie run), I’d meet several someones every time I left the house.
Some women call the Cutie Run emasculating or say it’s pursuing men. (I’m yet to hear a man complain about the advice. When I’m on panels, I’ve had guys give a standing O.) It’s not. It’s putting yourself in position to meet who you want to know. It’s no different than your standard advice for how to behave at a networking event. And if you want a date and are too good to smile at a man? Eh. You kinda deserve to stay single really.

How did you get the opportunity to be featured on VH1’s “Lets Talk About Pep”?
I was initially called in by the producers to help them find more guys for the show and to help them navigate the NYC dating and social scene. As I was talking about my day-job, going on cutie-runs, keeping files of available Black men on my hardrive, running off the best places to meet men in the city, the best and newest condoms on the market (For the record: I don’t know from experience. Most condom companies send me gift baskets of 100s of condoms. I ask my guy friends to test them out for me and report back) they were a little baffled. Like, um, talking to men about relationships and sex, and going on dates, and writing about sex and dating and relationships is your job?
Me: Um. Yeah. The producers asked me to do a  screen test at that first meeting, then offered me a spot on the show that week.  It was a great experience.

What advice do you have for someone that wants to follow a path similar to yours?
“Create your own roadmap. You’ll get lost trying to follow somebody else’s.” — Susan Taylor